Meaningless Contractions

If I may complain for one more moment (and since this is my blog, I may)—I'm having somewhat uncomfortable contractions many times a day and many times a night—have been for about a month now—and still I probably won't go into spontaneous labor in the next week-and-a-half? Don't cramping and contractions and effacement and dilation and +1 station MEAN anything anymore?

I liked the contractions when I thought they were getting me somewhere, but now that I know they aren't getting me anywhere quickly enough to make much of a difference in terms of when I'm likely to deliver (read: I could easily be 10 days late again), they make me a little crabby. The way it would make anyone crabby to have menstrual cramps off and on for 3 straight days that you're not allowed to take Advil (or red wine) for.

I'm grateful to be healthy, grateful the baby appears to be healthy, grateful I'm not on bed rest or pregnant with quadruplets or fifteen years old or single or living in poverty or in Mississippi or with a Republican—but still. Get me a baby already.

Please!

photo courtesy duboix, morgueFile