Today's Random Coffee Shop Rant

I’ve never been a big fan of crossword puzzles. Rather than a fun word game (which you would think I, a writer, would like), I experience crossword puzzles for what they are: a torturous trivia game with a heavy spelling component.

My brain sees the letter “s” in the middle of a word and can suddenly only think of words that start with the letter “s”—or whatever.

Anyway, it turns out that there is something more torturous than doing a crossword puzzle—and that’s sitting at a table next to two old men doing a crossword puzzle together, but only one of them can see it. So he is narrating the entire process for his buddy.

“It’s number four down.”

“Down?”

“Down. Four. The clue is merry.”

“Mary? Like mother of God?”

“No, merry, like Christmas.”

“Jesus?”

“No, merry. M-e-r-r-y. It’s four letters and the third letter from the end is a “c.”

Holy Mother of God!!!!! Make it stop!

photo courtesy cohdra, morgueFile